Attorney General Barr’s offices have been ablaze with activity this week. Sources close to his staff are telling us there are huge indictments coming soon, that the Clintons and Obamas are being implicated for high crimes.
While we could not reach Barr for comment, we were able to catch up with his Executive Propaganda Manager Aubrey Nelson in Las Vegas recently, she gave us this “official” statement:
“There are definitely indictments coming. Huge. The best indictments ever. We have three ROCK solid witnesses, the Obamas and the Clintons are finally GOING DOWN!!!”
One witness prefers to remain anonymous but our sources tell us that the witness was overheard talking about Satanic ritualistic murder and conspiracy to defraud the American public. We could not reach this witness for an official statement, but our sources have the best track record to date.
When asked about this, another witness identifying herself as Sandy Batt went on record saying
“I can confirm, I used to be part of their group until it got to be too much. The rituals were fun, we even had cute little chants like ‘mecha lecka high mecha hiney ho’ and the like.
Michelle and Bill were especially fond of the little dances that went with the chants, but I think Barry and Hillary were just in It for the Adrenochrome. It got to be too much when Hillary started telling me about all the obstruction and treason, something should really be done about that.
Couldn’t they be hung?”
Liberal hack Benza Cox was overheard commenting about being hung, saying the correct term is “swole in the right place, amiright?”
A third witness, William Hand of Plano, Texas, is especially agitated. Mr. Hand agreed to go on record making this statement:
“I seen them Satanist creeps harvesting the pineal glands of small children for that Adrenochrome, it was horrifying. I was already peeved about the obstruction of the Democrats, holding up the stimulus check was the last straw. If Barr don’t get somethin’ done I sure as Hell will, I’m infected with the Coronadovirus, I don’t give a shit. I’ll load up my .338 Lapua ‘Joe Barron Special,’ head to Washington and handle some business.”
We are hearing rumors that there are more witnesses that want to go on record but are scared that they will end up on Hillary’s suicide list. As new information comes to light we will keep you posted.